August 19, 2013
Worst Zoo In The World Tries To Pass Dog As A Lion
Quick, can you spot the difference between a dog and a lion?
Then the zoo in the People’s Park of Luohe, Henan, China, wants your patronage!
Now, sure…the dog has big fluffy hair and, sure, has the general shape of a lion — that is to say, bigger in the front (what with all that hair) than in the back.
But, come on.
This is an amusing enough story, but it transforms into that special kind of amusing ; the kind where a child’s grief adds to the hilarity of it all, like kids who get their pictures taken with a cheap, side-of-the-road Buzz Lightyear and see the same beloved character moments later lifting a paper bag to his lips during his smoke break.
You know the kind of funny I’m talking about.
One visitor named “Liu” wanted to take her son to the zoo to teach him about all the sounds the different animals make. The beast inside the cage marked “lion” however, was barking.
When zoo officials were asked “Hey, where’s your *expletive* lion?” (expletives mine) they explained that, yes, they do own a lion, it’s just away at the moment getting it on with another lion to make more lions. This, I presume, will prevent further situations wherein the zoo has to call in Fido, the stand-in lion.
After doing a little more poking around in this perfunctory zoo, journalists found even more stand-in animals posing as creatures they clearly aren’t. For instance, a snake’s cage was filled instead with rodents, a white fox was resting inside a leopard’s den, and there was yet another dog skulking about in a wolf pen.
Alright, let’s just go ahead and give them that one, assuming the dog in question wasn’t one of Paris Hilton’s throw away models.
But wait, it gets worse!
There’s also some question about how much this zoo is charging visitors to see snake rodents and cat dogs. Tickets are allegedly marked at 10 yuan for adults, yet tourists who enter the zoo have reportedly been charged as much as 15 yuan.
Liu is also upset by the pricing, saying: “The zoo is absolutely cheating us. They are trying to disguise the dogs as lions.”
Would you like to know what’s harder than believing that someone thought putting a dog in a lion’s cage was a pretty good idea?
Finding a way politely poke fun at them without becoming highly offensive.
I’m not sure I can track the sequence of thoughts that start at “Holy crap, our lion’s out in a horny frenzy” and ends with “eh, just throw Fido in there,” but apparently it’s not an uncommon path in China.
On Sina Weibo, China’s version of Twitter, one person suggested, “They should at least use a husky to pretend to be a wolf.”
Yeah, because using substitute animals isn’t a completely horrible idea so long as you get just close enough.
Image Credit: Sergey Lavrentev / Shutterstock